US Just Bombed The Sh*t Out of ISIS

ISIS

Ilhan Omar is counting her cousins today. The United States just bombed the sh*t out of ISIS in Somalia. We sent a courtesy airstrike out to Timirshe as a little assist to our “Somali and partner forces.” Seven unlucky terrorists didn’t make it back home to the goat they sleep with.

First ISIS strike since October

Brigadier General Miguel Castellanos, deputy director of operations for U.S. Africa Command put out a news release on Wednesday describing their work of the day before. ISIS came out of the hole they were hiding in since October and “attacked partner forces, in a remote location near Timirshe.” That’s in the northeastern part of Somalia, the home country of Ilhan Omar, the brother she married, and her other husband, about 140 kilometers southeast of Bosasso.

In coordination with the Federal Government of Somalia, when the terrorist militants attacked, AFRICOM called in “an airstrike that killed seven ISIS members,” the formal statement confirms. It’s the first time we had to kick Islamic State ass since October. Lately, we “usually target al Qaeda affiliate al Shabaab.” We like to put them on a stick and roast them over hot coals.

Liberals back home in the states have nothing to run to global rights advocates about because the military doesn’t believe “any civilians were injured or killed in the strike.” Only ISIS goat humpers.

Rid Somalia of terrorists

American forces just happened to be in the area. They were making their usual rounds “in order to advise and assist Somali and partner forces.” Currently there are around 500 American troops stationed in Somalia “on a mission of training and advising local forces to fight al Shabaab and ISIS.”

According to General Castellanos, “We continue to apply pressure on terrorist groups and assist our Somali partners in disrupting their operations.” Do unto others before they do unto you. “We continue our support to rid Somalia of the likes of ISIS and al Shabaab.”

They aren’t just fighting with bombs and bullets over there. It’s a war of words too. “Terrorist groups continue to resort to the tradecraft of terror and propaganda in an effort to intimidate the local populace.” That’s verified by Colonel Chris Karns. “Mistruths and lies are the terrorist weapons of choice. ISIS-Somalia and al-Shabaab have bankrupt narratives and visions of the future. Our partnership to unmask and degrade the capability of these terrorists is essential to security and stability in Somalia.”

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